My New Friend
I met a very interesting person yesterday. I had to go to Walmart to pick up some stuff and develop some pictures, and as my mom was looking at exercise shorts I noticed a Fantastic 4 stretching arm laying on one of the clothing racks. Being the easily entertained person that I am I thought this was great fun, so naturally I tried to see what sort of things I could pick up with it! As I was unsuccessfully trying to pick my purse up off the floor I heard a little voice say, "whats that?". Looking up I saw a little girl, probably about 6 years old, staring at the blue plastic arm in my hand.
"This is a stretching arm like the one in the movie Fantastic 4! You use it to pick up stuff far way. Do you want to try?" I asked.
She just grinned and took the arm from me trying (also unsuccessfully) to pick up my purse. At this point my mom turns around and says: "I would use that arm for tickling!" She took the arm from the girl and pretended to tickle her with it. The girl had a piercing laugh and ran off a little ways, but not for long. Next thing I know she has picked up the arm and after yelling, "I'm going to tickle you", starts chasing me around the clothing section. I ran around in circles around the racks and yelled back, You'll never catch me!! I got half way around one rack and realized that she had changed directions and was coming straight at me! This went on for a little while until she gave up on the arm and moved onto just "I'm going to get you!" After a while her mom came looking for her and she went off obediently but I couldn't help but laugh at how bold she was. Most kids hide behind their mom's when you talk to them. I can only imagine what she is going to be like when she grows up...
The Adventures of Timmy, Episode 2
It was an average day in the Gane household. Timmy had woken up late, and gone to the tv for some prime time in the daytime television. After flipping through most of the stations, and finding absolutely no cartoons, he decided to run to the market and get some groceries.
The sun shone brightly as Timmy stepped out his door and scanned the yard for his trusty motor scooter. It was tipped over next to the mail box, and he quickly picked it up and headed up the street. As he rounded the corner towards the grocery store he noticed quite a lot of commotion going on around the entrance. A large man in a black and white striped suit appeared to be terrorizing the customers. As he got closer he could hear the mans shouts.
"DANIMALS! GIVE ME DANIMALS!" roared the striped man.
"Is that..it couldn't be! It's Zeeeebruh-Man! The Danimals Yogurt fiend!!" Cried Timmy. "This is a cause for SUUUUPERGANE!!"
Timmy ran into the nearby florist shop and changed behind some shrubberies, then ran out and towards the market. The frenzied Zeeeebruh-Man barely glanced as Timmy charged towards him at his tippity toppest speed. He merely grabbed the walker from an elderly lady nearby and started banging at the market windows, trying to get to the yogurt supply inside.
"That is unacceptable behavior Zeeeebruh-Man!" shouted Timmy through the chaos. "Give that woman back her walker!"
The enraged Zeeeebruh-Man glared at Timmy through bloodshot eyes and shouted "DANIMALS! GIVE ME DANIMALS!"
Seeing a small window of oppurtunity, Timmy pulled out a bottle of Danimals Drinkables and threw it into the buggy round up. Zeeebruh-Man tossed the walker like a toy and ran into the round up after the Drinkable yogurt. Once he got inside, Timmy quickly blocked his exit with several spare carts, and the crowds cheered.
"Give it up Zeeeebruh-Man! You cannot win!" Said Timmy, grinning.
While he looked around at the crowd for some positive feedback, the lady with a walker cast him a seductive look and a wink. This was Timmy's cue to leave. As the sound of the sirens grew steadily louder, Timmy poured out the contents of a Danimals Drinkable into the initials SG, jumped on his scooter, and rode off into the day.
"That is one fiiine brave man." proclaimed the lady wistfully as she watched Timmy turn the corner and barely miss a trashcan.
"Yes he is." Agreed Zeeeebruh-Man. "I can only hope that after my time in the penetentiary and jail cell is done, we can become friends."
On that happy note, the police officers cuffed Zeeeebruh-Man, and once again the day was saved by the infamous SUUUPERGANE! (who is still without groceries)
Zeeeebruh-Man was put on a 5 step program to overcome his addiction to Danimals, and later sued the Danimals company for making such amazingly addicting yogurt.
-The End-
The Adventures of Timmy, Episode 1
Once upon a time there was a boy named Timmy. Timmy had a funny English accent and pronounced the word zebra wrong. His friend Kimmi thought it was very funny and made fun of him all the time (good naturedly of course). One day as Timmy was on his way home from didgeridoo rehearsal, trying to practice variations in the word zebra, he saw a poor defenseless building surrounded by what looked to be several orphans with gasoline tanks!
"Oh no!" said Timmy. "That poor building is going to suffer a terrible and untimely demise if I don't act now!"
Timmy Grabbed the edges of his shirt and tore the buttons apart, revealing...his chest.
"I must have forgotten my SuperGane suit at the cleaners!" Timmy muttered, as he patched the seams with some spare duct tape.
Not wanting to uncover his secret identity, Timmy quickly ran into the cleaners, picked up his suit, and changed in the nearest Porta-potty, seeing as the telephone booth was occupied.
"Lets try this again." Timmy chuckled to himself as he tore the remaining pieces of shirt off his SuperGane suit. "Have no fear, SUUUPERGANE IS HERE!" shouted Timmy.
"Look! It's an escaped carnie!" Cried one orphan
"No it isn't either. It's an extremely late business man!" Shouted another.
"You fools! Its SuperGane!" Realized the third.
The orphans were taken by surprise but they were a clever group of kids, and quickly doused the building with the remaining gasoline and lit a match. Fortunately the boys underestimated the true power of SuperGane! Timmy ran as fast as his Etnies would carry him and quickly blew out the match before it left their hands. Grabbing the 8 year olds by their collars Timmy made sure they wouldn't try anything sneaky by tying their shoelaces together and placing them in the nearest tree.
"You thought you could mess with the architecture, but you forgot to take into account the consequences of your actions, my young grasshoppers." Timmy scolded. "Next time boys, I hope you choose a less destructive hobby, but remember! You cannot defeat the amazing wit of SUUUPERGANE!!!"
At the sound of approaching police sirens Timmy quickly scratched his trademark SG onto the tree and called a cab, making a stealthy and original superhero getaway. As the orphans choked on the exhaust from SuperGane's cab, they realized that there was more to life then burning buildings, decided to live as respectable citizens from this day forth, and pledged to donate blood to the Blue Cross the very next day.
-The End-
One banana, two banana, three banana...
The longer I sit here the more I want to get up. The more I'm up the more I want to sit here. It's a vicious cycle and it needs to end. The past couple weeks have been a blur because every day after day it's the same routine. I wake up, go for a jog, take a shower and go to work, come home and tidy up around the house, Rinse, and repeat. I hate to admit it but I can't seem to make up my mind. During the school year I can't wait for summer and the orchard to open and all the advantages of summer break, but then it comes and I want to go back to school. I miss being with my friends every day. Unfortunately, that ended for reasons other than school ending, and I don't think things will be the same even after school starts again.The last couple days have actually been pretty busy at the restaurant/pick your own store and it has been an interesting experience with mom around again. Needless to say she is not cut out for the service industry. When I say busy, I actually mean busier than it has been, which adds up to about 10 customers or so. 10 customers is no problem for me but mom has a panic attack helping more than one costumer at a time. It can actually be quite entertaining watching her run around the kitchen snapping at everyone and shouting words of desperate frustration when she is forced to make something. Me and Jonathan try hard not to laugh but sometimes it's just not possible. Last year Jonathan had a bad habit of coming late to set up the grille every day. One day he came down about 10 minutes late to set up the grille and she got so upset that she actually shouted "I QUIT", retreated upstairs, and started vacuuming. Once we got a grip on ourselves we realized that this meant we had to run it under staffed, but it wasn't much of a problem.Well, it's 7:30 and I haven't walked Lassie once today. I feel a little bit guilty, seeing as I was given $100 to watch her for a couple months and I walk her about once a day. Sometimes twice if she's lucky. This would be so much easier if I didn't have to take a walk just to get to her and take her for a walk. The heat hasn't helped either. I've always said I like the heat better than the cold no matter what but it's been miserable the last few days. Mom seems to be reminding me of how horrible the heat is about every 3.6 seconds. I think she is trying to imply that it's my fault since I'm the one that claims to like it. Oi ve.Ok well I really don't have anything interesting to write about. Then again I didn't really have anything interesting to write about when I started writing either. Soo I guess I will just stop writing, and maybe go do something exciting so that I can write about it. Like trick or treating on the highway dressed as a deer! Anyway, maybe next time you can look forward to a life defining experience, but don't count on it.
Shoppers guide to the galaxy
Yesterday afternoon when the rest of the country was out having barbecue's, family reunions, and fireworks shows, I was at the Whitney Field Mall shopping for capris. What better way to spend the 4th of July then in an air conditioned store buying new clothes? There isn't one! My shopping experience went something like this.
I started out at Walmart to get a few basic necessities like soap...and peanut butter cups. They have awesome store brand peanut butter cups. There was an amazingly attractive guy looking at the deodorant and he had the coolest eyes I've ever seen. Not that I was staring. I wasn't actually trying to follow him but every time i walked to another isle he just happened to be walking by too and it looked like I was stalking him. Ok, so maybe I was, but only a little and it was all good natured!
Anyway, from Walmart I headed over to the mall for some holiday weekend sales at Filenes. They had *tons* of capris there, all on sale anywhere from $12 to $17, which is a good price. I think I must have tried on about 30 pairs. My mom sat patiently in a chair by the waiting room to tell me how each pair looked. I was in heaven. Finally I narrowed it down to about 6 pairs. I only had enough money to buy two, so it was time for semi-finals. I eliminated 3, and then set aside one pair for sure. The competition now consisted of two L.e.i. beige capris. They were both a lot alike, with only minor differences in the pocket style and hem. SO naturally I had to hold finals. I tried on each pair again, modeled them for my mom, and then repeated the process. It was a touch decision but I think we made the right choice. The loser joined the mass of other rejected capris that were weighing down the return rack, and the winner came home with me. In fact I'm wearing them now, very trendy.
Little did we know that while we were in the mall our peanut butter cups were suffering an untimely demise. As we sat down in the car again I opened the bag and found them melted into a puddle. I tried to salvage some but all I ended up doing was getting it all over my hand and face and looking like a 5 year old, which can be fun, but is generally frowned upon.
After we got home we turned the TV to channel 4 and watched the Boston Pops concert at the Esplanade. I have decided that next year I am definately going to go to it. I'm planning a year in advance so there will be no confusion, and I'm really excited :D. I will take the T in the night before with however many people I can get to come along, and we will camp out by the Esplanade and get our places first thing in the morning. We're going to dress up too! I have also decided that sometime between now and then I must learn to swing dance. However, I need a partner...any volunteers?
A walk down memory lane
Yesterday evening around 6:20 I came in from working outside with dad and walked up the stairs. I was sweaty, dirty, and tired. As I walked by Jonathan's room he called to me and informed me that we were going to Steve and Aubie's house for their mom's birthday - in 10 minutes. Back in the day I used to go over to their house every Friday night for supper, and every Saturday afternoon for lunch. It was like our tradition. I loved going over there and I always had a good time. After me and Steve broke up things got kind of awkward, and I wasn't really invited over there much. Jonathan still went like usual but I ended up staying home. I hadn't been there in about two months, so this came as a little bit of a surprise, and let me tell you I did not want to go. Me and Steve haven't talked in about 3 months and I'm pretty much afraid of the guy. I felt like I should go though, because I didn't want him to think I'm angry at him, which isn't the case. It's just that he's been ignoring me a lot lately. It's like he's a different person than the one I knew, and I'm afraid of what he thinks of me. So anyway, I ran around trying to find something to wear and clean myself up and then went out to the jeep where Jonathan was waiting for me. As we headed up George Hill Road and onto route 62 I panicked. I mean really, what am I supposed to say!? Where should I sit? How should I act?? I sat there in silence a minute and then I said a prayer. I practically begged God to help me out. I said it didn't matter what happened, how we acted around each other, or whether it was good or bad. All I wanted was to not care either way. Just pleeease let me be indifferent to the situation. Let me be over this.I think me and Steve said about one comment directly to each other the whole night, we were in separate rooms for most of the time, and it was quite obvious that he couldn't care less. Regardless, I had a great time. A month ago I would have thought it was a miserable night. I would have thought the whole thing went horribly, that I was never going to get over the awkwardness and it would have mattered to me. Last night I didn't care. We told memorable birthday stories in the living room, we watched father of the bride in Steve's room, and then Aubie, Jill and I retreated downstairs to Aubie's room and talked for over an hour. It's not to say I didn't have flashbacks of the times I spent there in the past. I did, but they didn't phase me. It was more of a "that was a good day, but this is now, this is what I have." We didn't leave until about 11.It's not like I'm through with everything or that I will never care again. I probably will, and it will probably be a long time before I go over there again, but I'm just glad that I could make the best out of the time I did have. I think this time God answered my prayer just the way I wanted Him to. :D Happy Sabbath!
Ode to Blueberries, Part 2
Today I thought I would post the continuation of my lovely father daughter bonding hours, which turned out to be 7 all together. Honestly it didn't turn out quite as bad as I had expected! We went out around 2:45 in miserable heat and it's safe to say I wasn't in the best of moods. I quickly solved that by swatting a deer fly that had landed on dads head. This vented out most of my frustration on him for taking me out there. Besides, you know he only did it because he knows he can pay me less than his other employees! It's injustice. Anyway, my hand eye coordination is not the sharpest and I accidentally hit his glasses causing his nose to bleed a little. I know, I know, who does that? Well...I do.Now, if you have ever met my dad you would know that he lives for lecturing people, testing his limits, and pushing buttons. The fact that I am incredibly easily entertained is no doubt inherited from him. As we tied some of the netting to a post the song "Collide" by Howie Day came on the radio. I really like that song so I said "Hey this is a good song!" Any normal person would have just agreed or disagreed, dad of course had to take it from a totally different angle. "Why do you like this song? What do you think he is talking about?" He asked"Well, I guess he is talking about love. The fact that it is blind, it finds it's own way? No matter what doubts they have they always...collide." I said. So now, seeing his opportunity to share his infinite wisdom, he asks "what is love?"This is where my dad and I differ the most. He is a being of pure logic. He looks at every aspect of life in it's most mechanical, logical reasoning. I tend to have a more emotional way of explaining things. I believe that for some things there just isn't a logical explanation. He went into his whole spiel that went something like this: "happiness is a choice, love is not just a pitter patter in your chest every time you see someone. It is a conscious decision. It is finding someone who has the similar goals as you, who is willing to make sacrifices to make you happy, and who you can commit to make sacrifices for. You aren't always going to have the same die hard romantic emotions when you see them. You have to be willing to stay on board even when those feelings seem to be gone, because you are two people working together in life."Next he twisted it around to break ups and informed me that after I've been through 5 or 6 it will be old habit and I will be over it in a couple days because there is always someone else who is better out there. I argued that if you can get over someone in just a few days then there must not have been anything involved. What your saying is that once I've dated enough people I will tune myself out to the emotions so that I don't set myself up for heartache anymore. If that were the case I would never find the right person and I would live my life always thinking that there is something better than what I have. So he said "of course! You're never going to find the perfect person who you will be happy with forever. Happiness is a choice, love is only a way of saying self sacrifice for someone else."I suppose he has a point. After thinking about how my last relationship ended it made a little bit more sense than I thought. I was told "I just don't like you like that anymore". I always thought about it in the perspective of "you just can't help how you feel", but maybe it is what dad said. You have to choose to sacrifice yourself for the relationship, because there are always going to be times when the passion isn't there. You just have to stick it through those times and chose to be happy no matter what. I don't know, I suppose there is an answer somewhere between the two extremes.Ok, now that I have turned my story into sappiness, I'm going to get back on track. After a few hours had gone by dad tried to find a new source of entertainment. We decided to tell a story, each taking a paragraph, and see what we came up with. It turned out to be a horrible tale of a man named Bob who desperately wanted to get into a prestigious culinary school but was turned down because of his allergy to nuts. He flew to Japan in search of the master of mind and body control, Chai Kwan Lee. After we had put about as much entertainment as we could think of into the story, including spies from the culinary school, stealing of Donald Trumps Toupee, and the elixer of deceit, we realized it had reached its climax and killed off Bob. Next we tried giving each other a subject and a couple minutes to create a joke from it. That didn't go over too well. I was supposed to come up with a joke about a frog with six legs and my punch line ended up having something to do with a six pack. I would retell it but I'm too ashamed. I have to say that his was worse though.Anyway, my point was that regardless of the situation I really didn't have a terrible time. I haven't really spent too much time with my dad this year since I've been out with my other friends and it was kind of a nice chance to spend some time with him. Not that I would want to repeat the experience, especially not the first half, but eh, it kind of made me think about things. Thinking is good :) So not only did I enhance my mind but the blueberries are all safe and sound. (We open the 10th, come buy fruit so I can go to college!)OH! I almost forgot, rabbit rabbit! :D
